KIRKWOOD, MO– You want to know what I love? America. And it kills me to see this great country in danger of becoming a godless Bolshevik playground. With his ludicrous ideas such as “universal health care” and “pay equality for women,” Bernie Sanders is practically turning us into communist Sweden. With his slick-talking Brooklyn accent, he is corrupting our poor ignorant youths, turning them from respectable people into man-bun wearing, handout-taking liberals.

As Sanders grows more popular, true red-blooded Americans like me are growing more fearful of his big-government ways. If only we lived in the time of powerful Republican leaders like Teddy Roosevelt and his protection of the American public against the abuses of overgrown business, George W. Bush’s $400 billion Medicare bills extending health care to greater number of Americans than ever before or Reagan’s legalization of millions of illegal immigrants in 1986. I remember a time when leaders cared more about the American public more than pushing their political agendas.

If only we lived in a time with leaders like those above as opposed to “Socialist Sanders.” At least we have a true red-blooded American running for office in the form of Donald Trump.