TRUMP’S SCALP- Many people seem to enjoy making fun of Mr. Trump’s hair, yet no one even attempts to appreciate how much time and effort it must have taken to train a cat to lie perfectly still on top of his head for hours at a time. Personally, I have two cats and they completely ignore me a majority of the time, so to have one sit so quietly is an impressive feat indeed. Although I find his hair both humorous and impressive, others have very different opinions. Our resident animal rights correspondent contacted the American Union of Unionizing Against the Use of Cats as Headwear (AUUAUCH) and they stated that “[Trump ] will soon be contacted by their lawyers” for “animal abuse in the realm of fashion” and “not even looking that good while doing it.”

While Trump continues to maintain that the orange lumpy mound on top of his head is his real hair AUUAUCH remains unconvinced and is in the process of filing charges. There has yet to be a release from Trump’s PR team, but legal experts say we might be seeing something new on Trump’s head in the coming weeks as the scandal unfolds.