Prince charming can wait for now

Is that the sound of wedding bells I hear? Wait, no.

Just the warning bell shouting at lingering students in the halls to get to class. Lockers slam, and star-crossed lovers share one last kiss before the tragedy of English class tears them apart for an excruciating 57 minutes. Ah, young love.

I write this column at the risk of being called cynical, but my family has already implied I’m a strong candidate for a future cat lady, so I figure I don’t have much to lose. Relationships are an inevitable aspect of the high school experience. Toss 1,800 hormone-ridden teens into a building for seven hours a day and sparks are bound to fly.

I’ve watched close friends fall head-over-heels and even experienced some butterflies myself, so I’m not condemning anyone who has chosen to take themselves off the market. Dating can teach valuable lessons if the people involved are mature enough to see them and can focus on something other than the dreamy eyes of their significant other.

That being said, I have a few issues concerning our coupled-off culture. Watch almost any movie or TV show, read any book or listen to any song geared toward teens, and you will be bombarded with messages reinforcing said couples culture. Happy endings rarely come with an individual finding peace or emerging triumphant on their own. They can only live happily ever after once they have been successfully paired off with a special someone.

The constant depiction of relationships as the norm can be stressful to those who are lacking a counterpart, whether by their own choice or not. At least 10 percent of teens struggle with an anxiety disorder, according to Psychology Today, and romance only adds another dimension to the everyday worries of balancing already crazy schedules, not to mention trying to squeeze in a little “you time” here and there.

Finding time to study for a biology test is hard enough without having to waste hours hunting for the perfect Valentine’s Day gift. From another practical perspective, options for potential dates or mates are pretty limited in high school, so it may not be the time to find Mr. or Mrs. Right. Being picky, or having standards, or whatever you want to call it, is not a bad thing.

This is where I worry about sounding harsh, but the truth is most high schoolers simply are not mature enough for a relationship. I can barely decide where to go to lunch each day, much less the type of person I would spend the rest of my life with. Most teenagers change drastically over the course of four years, and according to The Huffington Post, only two percent of married couples in the United States are former high school sweethearts.

Close relationships often develop at the expense of other friendships. An Oxford University study found that on average, a serious romantic relationship pushes two friends from your inner circle. Being a teen brings new challenges, and rather than sharing their juicy gossip with their parents, many young adults depend heavily on their peers for support, so neglecting close relationships in order to put all your attention on one person who may or may not remain in your life is unwise.

However, if your friends are true-blue, no matter how much distance grows between you, they will come running back to your side the moment tragedy strikes: the breakup. On the bright side, no matter how messy or ugly the demise of a relationship is, you can undoubtedly find an appropriate Taylor Swift song to complement your precise degree of heartbreak, anger or both.

High school is not the be-all, end-all. You don’t need to find “the one” and settle down the day after graduation. These four years should be a time to lay the groundwork for your future, not a race to seal your fate in stone. As for me, I’m fairly sure my family members are exaggerating when they tease about my future feline companions, or at least I hope they are, so  for now I’ll hold off on taking suggestions for cat names.